Chad & Trixie

Remember in high school how everyone had a label? The sporty people were jocks, the smart people were nerds, the people whose wardrobes consisted of too many metallica t-shirts were stoners. I think you see where I'm going. I'm not usually an advocate of labels, I actually hate them, but this next one is funny to me. (Plus, I got made fun of by a Trixie the other day so nah nah nah nah nah) Anyway, here in Chicago they have their own little labels. For instance... Like ya know those girls that like totally wear the t-shirts that like totally show their tummies, and like always have the best chunky blonde highlights? Yeah, well they're called Trixies. And dude, you know the guys that are still all about how popular they were in high school that drive the raddest cars and date the Trixies? Yeah, they're referred to as Chads. So Chad & Trixie generally live in the more affluent neighborhoods, and they wouldn't be caught dead taking public transportation. *Gasp* (I've actually heard a girl say that) And as one final generalization, Chad & Trixie aren't extremely tolerable of people that aren't of the same little cookie cutter lifestyle. Enter Melissa, nice girl that thinks that everyone is inherently good. Melissa who considers everyone a true-blue friend until they prove otherwise. Melissa who smiles and says "Good Morning" to strangers. Chad & Trixie HATE Melissa. Melissa dresses funny. Sometimes Melissa wears too much black. Chad & Trixie HATE black! Hasn't Melissa heard that pink is the new black?? Melissa must be one of those weird Goth chicks. Melissa smells like patchouli. Chad & Trixie HATE patchouli! Doesn't Melissa know that if Calvin Klein didn't make it, it's not perfume? Melissa must be one of those stinkin' hippies. Chad & Trixie must cut her down and show her that they are superior! WHEW! Ok, this is starting to turn into a rant so I'm just going to tell you the story...

I have a brand new shiny bicycle. It's a super sweet green vintage style cruiser with a basket in the front. It's my new best friend. I LOVE my bike. I ride my bike everywhere. I even bought a really cool bike trailer for Adrian so that I can ride it to work everyday. So, the other night my bike and I went for a long ride around my favorite place to live...Chicago. We were having the best of times, not a care in the world. Then we ran into Chad & Trixie. Now, at first I didn't know that they were Chad & Trixie. I thought they were a nice, normal, non-judgmental couple. Maybe they were Joe & Sara. (spelled without the 'h') Being the nice girl that I am, I smiled at who I thought were my friendly neighbors, Joe & Sara, as I passed on my bike. But as I passed, Joe & Sara morphed into that horrible, materialistic, half-witted couple Chad & Trixie. Trixie called out in her shrill little voice "dit di dit di di di, dit di dit di di di" (think Wizard of Oz during the tornado scene when the wicked witch rides past Dorothy's window on her bike) She was making fun of my bike! Whore! Why in the world would she make fun of me? I seriously don't understand. Was she that insecure? I myself am an insecure person at times, but it doesn't make me want to cut others down. It makes me want to avoid eye contact or stay in the house all day. Why would she do that? The only thing I can figure is that she caught Chad staring at my ass as I passed on my super sweet bike and it was the only way she could get the attention back on herself. Who knows.